All I Have Ever Wanted
by Fate-Means-Screwed-On-Purpose
Summary: “You don't wanna reach for me, do you? I mean nothing to you. The little things give you away.” I shouted, furious with him. “All you have ever wanted was someone to truly look up to you. And Six feet under water, I do.” He replied softly. Hilson! Rate X
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hilson One-shot. Rated X for Wilson/House pairing and explicit sexual scenes.

Pairing: House and Wilson

Warning: Slash, smut, pure Hilson. Everything good and awesome in this universe of never to be Hilson brought together in one one-shot. Lots of fluff though. If Hilson id your thing then this is your story

Type: One-Shot.

Word length:

Summary: "You don't wanna reach for me, do you? I mean nothing to you. The little things give you away." I shouted, furious with him. "All you have ever wanted was someone to truly look up to you. And Six feet under water, I do." He replied softly. Hilson!

To bad the FOX people and David Shore is intent on Huddy. I want Hilson! HILSON!

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**All I Have Ever Wanted**

_Wilson's P.O. V._

* * *

I stare at the ceiling wondering about random things. Completely random. Except their not. Anytime I close my eyes I see his face, smell his smell, see his electric blue eyes staring into mine, and feel my shoulders bumping with his as the both of you walk, side by side, down the long narrow hallways. I love all that. I need all that, because if I didn't have all that, then what did I have to hold onto? He was the only thing I held onto, the only reason I hadn't offed myself, just yet. Sometimes I thought I saw care in his eyes when he looked at them, sometimes I thought I saw love in those eccentric pools of blue, sometimes I thought I saw desire, want, need, or lust, but then I remind myself that it wasn't possible. He could never feel the same way I felt about him.

No chance, I thought to myself as the sound of wood on wood rapped against my door. Then the door burst open to reveal the One, the Only, The Gregory House, right on queue. It was amazing how said diagnostician could appear as if his name had been called with the words "I've got some lollipops for him." whenever I thought about him. The second he entered my thoughts, he was right there.

He limped over easily toward me and pressed his palms to the side of the desk closest to him. He had slammed the door behind him and I had closed my blinds so it occurred to me how isolated we both were now. His electric blue eyes locked with my hazy brown ones. Mine were glazed over in thought as I rather stared right through him. I was trying to see if I could make myself not be affected by him, but soon gave up when I felt that warm tug on my heart that I always got when he came around. Greg looked at me curiously, apparently interested in something or another. I narrowed my eyes and tried to force myself to sound annoyed and tired, like I always did, so he would leave and I could relax my guard on my emotions.

"Whatcha thinking 'bout, Jimmy?" he asked, apparently intrigued. I sighed and looked back down at my paper work, all too keenly aware of how close he was when he leaned over and pulled up a chair at the front of my desk. He sat down in it, momentarily rubbing his leg. I felt a shot of pain slice through my heart at the thought of him being in pain. He's always in pain; I tried to convince myself but it just made its grip tighten on my heart. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on my desk while dropping his chin into his upturned palms. It was slow, vicious, merciless torture to have him this close and not be able to have him.

"I said, what are I thinking about, Jayme?" he repeated, this time using my old nickname. That grabbed my attention. He hadn't called me Jayme in almost 10 years. I secretly loved that nickname, but I would never let him know it. That bit of information would provide his with mocking material for years on end! My head snapped up to match his gaze.

"You haven't called me Jayme in a very long time, Greg." I pointed out in barely over a whisper. We both just stared at each other for what felt like an eternity to me. Finally, I looked away, as the blood rush up my neck and colored my cheeks with hot shyness.

"Well that's interesting," he observed thoughtfully.

"What?" I countered bringing my gaze back up to his.

"You blushed." he pointed out with a smirk, but surprisingly, his tone held no mockery. Just pure curiosity.

I looked away awkwardly. This time, when he spoke again, his voice was soft, kind and genuinely intrigued.

"Why won't you tell me what your thinking about?" he asked thoughtfully.

I don't know why I answered honestly, as I made my way around my desk and sat on the couch, I just did.

"Because if I even told you one little piece of what I was thinking about, you would use it to mock me for the rest of my life…or leave, which by my standards is about ten thousand times worse. So, if I keep my mouth shut, you don't leave, or mock me. I'm more worried about the leaving part, though." I rambled.

He watched me for a good amount of time before finally sighing and making his way to the couch and collapsing next to me. He was so close that our thighs touched and I felt adrenaline spike through my body and my heart pounding in my veins.

"I can't exactly mock you either, Jayme. I'd be a very big hypocrite if I did that. Considering that what I, myself, have been thinking would give you a right to mock me for the rest of my own miserable existence…or leave, which by my standard is ten thousand times worse. So, if I keep _my _mouth shut, you don't leave. I'm pretty sure you leaving would come close to killing me…" He whispered the last part in a breathless tone as a sort of reddish color brushed his cheeks. Did Greg just blush?

Awkward silence filled the room, unbearably loud. I felt his gaze on mine.

"I'll tell you mine, if you tell me yours…" I whispered hoarsely. I watched Greg nod out of the corner of my eye. I looked at my hands fumbling with them awkwardly. Suddenly I was furious. Furious with myself for falling in love with my best friend and risking our friendship and furious with him for not caring about me like I cared for him. He was my whole world and I was nothing to him, I meant absolutely nothing to him, or so I thought…

I found myself on my feet and spinning to him. My heart was pounding and I was absolutely furious at him. I heard a ringing in my ears and the whole world felt like it was moving so slow. Turning to him, I spat out the first words that came to mind, the first feelings that I felt I needed to tell him.

"_**You don't wanna reach for me, do you? I mean nothing to you. The little things give you away." **_As soon as I said it I felt all the air rush out of me and a feeling of relief settle over me. I brought my gaze to settle on Greg's. He looked like he had been slapped. Disbelief colored his face and struggling, he brought himself to his feet. He let out a breath that he looked to have been holding in since I had stood. He took a calm breath and then looked at me disbelievingly. He took a step forward so that he was standing barely an inch away from my.

"_**Jayme, All you have ever wanted was for someone to truly look up to you. And Six feet under water, I do." **_he replied. I was left stunned and breathless. He looked at me softly and then raised a hand and rested it on my shoulder.

"You _have _to **know that**, Jayme. _Six feet under water,_ **I do**. Remember that." he told me convincingly. Then, he met my gaze one last time, turned on his heels, and limped toward the door.

"Greg..." I called in barely over a whisper as I felt the tears build in the corner of my eyes. I watched him stop and just stand for a couple of seconds.

"Yeah?" I heard him reply in the same barely audible tone without turning. I took a couple steps forward, toward him, and they seemed to take forever. Standing behind him, I rested my head on the back of his shoulder. Taking breath after breath felt so much more difficult.

"I love you. I'm god damn in love with you! There's your answer. That's what I was thinking about." I have no idea why I told him that but, all of a sudden; I felt the weight come back because I knew what would happen. I felt a single tear slide down my cheek and I waited for the inevitable. I closed my eyes savoring the last I'd ever have of him and breathed out. "As much as it will kill me, you can leave now if I want..." I continued when he didn't respond.

"You're serious...?" I heard him breathe out softly. "Yes, I'm dead serious, Greg. I don't know why or how, I just know that I am and, even if I wanted to, I wouldn't be able to do a god damn thing about it." I replied very softly, my voice cracking as I felt tears race down my cheeks and soak his shirt, even though I tried in vain to will them away.

"You're an idiot." he whispered as he turned toward me, making me bring my head upright. I felt hot embarrassment color my cheeks. Why did I have to cry, like a little kid, in front of him? I looked up at him with tear filled eyes.

He looked at me. But...There was something different. All of his attention seemed to be just on me, instead of him thinking of a million other things like normal. He had that look in his eyes like he was completely focused. And, not only that, but the sharp analyzing look to his eyes wasn't there.

"Yeah. I know. I'm an idiot for ever entertaining the chance that you might be able to feel the same way, I'm an idiot for ever hoping that you could love me like I love you. You're right, as always, I'm an idiot." I replied, letting my eyes rest anywhere but him.

"Jayme. Jayme, look at me. Please, look at me." he responded in a begging sort of tone.

I looked up at him, astonished at his tone. He didn't seem upset, he seemed genuinely calm, but a look of disbelief hung in his eyes. He leaned down so that our noses were almost touching.

"No, that's not why an idiot. That's where you were smart." he whispered in an almost in audible tone. He leaned a little more forward so that my lips brushed with his. I gasped in surprise and felt a little shock of thrill go through me. His lips pressed against mine hungrily but yet in a soft tender sort of way that surprised me. I found myself kissing him back. My breath caught when I felt his tongue against my lips begging for entrance. I granted it and moaned as I felt his tongue pass over my teeth and slip over my tongue, sucking on it gently. I moaned softly and gasped as I brought my arms up and around his neck, knotting my fingers almost painfully in his hair.

He brought his arms around my waist, and pushed me back gently. One arms stayed wrapped around my waist, pressing me to him desperately. The other slid up diagonally, across the small of my back and tangled in my hair. I felt my back hit the couch and felt the air whoosh out of me. Reluctantly, we broke away, still remaining in the intimate embrace. I gasped, taking in shallow, short, uneven breaths and rested my forehead against his. I kept my eyes on his closed ones as he breathed in and out slowly. Apparently, trying to calm himself down. Not that I was complaining, but why had he kissed me? He doesn't feel the same way that I did, does he?

"Figure out where your idiocy lies yet?" he asked me in between gasps and still with closed eyes.

"No," I replied softly and curiously, "care to enlighten me?" I begged more than asked in the same breathless tone he had.

He opened his eyes for a second and then closed them tightly again. Before I could react he pressed his lips against mine again. Except this time, it was different. It had a different feeling to it. He kissed me with a feeling that I could only dream he could have. One that lied at the pit of my stomach and bothered me day and night. Love.

That took my breath away. It made me feel slightly dizzy and breathless, the way he kissed me. It made my stomach tumble and made me gasp. Unfortunately it also meant I had to break away before I died of lack of oxygen.

This time, with my eyes closed, I felt his eyes on me. Cautiously, I opened my eyes and locked mine with his. His looked exactly like mine felt. Pools of lust and desire, that had an underlining of such care, tenderness and love that made me dizzy to think about it. He pressed his forehead back to mine once again, and kept his eyes on mine.

"You're an idiot for ever entertaining the thought that I might not feel the same way. You're and idiot for event assuming that I _couldn't_ love you that way. Because **I already do**, _I am in love with you,_ Jayme. I don't know how or why, I just am, and even if I wanted to (which _I do not_) than I wouldn't be able to do a goddamn thing about it. I just am, Jayme. For entertaining the idea that I could be, you are smarter than me. Because, honestly, I never ever thought that it was even remotely possible..." he trailed off looking anywhere but at me.

I tightened my grip around his neck and closed my eyes brushing my lips with his softly. Just a soft chaste brush of lips turned into so much more when he kissed me back hungrily. He pushed me back gently onto the couch after looking around the room and at the door, checking that the door was locked and the blinds pulled. He walked back toward the door and locked it before heading toward me. Carefully he straddled my waist as he pressed kissed down from my lips, over my jaw, and down my neck.

"You sure this is a good idea?" I asked him cautiously, not wanting to watch 16 years of friendship go up in flames.

"Don't know," he murmured softly against my color bone making me shiver, "And, quite honestly, I don't care. All I know is that I've had to bite my lip and keep my mouth shut, as I watched you enter relationship after relationship, no matter how much it hurt, in order to make sure I still got to keep you around. I'm done keeping my mouth shut. What happens next happens. We'll burn that bridge when we come to it, and we'll get through it together. I love you. And I want-no, I _need_ you." he replied meeting my gaze.

I leaned up and caught his lips with mine. Tongues, teeth, and lips worked in a tango only we knew. I pulled away just enough to respond.

"You can have me. I just want- no, I just _need_ you." I answered softly as he pushed me back against the couch. He smiled against my collar bone leaving hot wet kissed along it. His lips slid up and sucked and nibbled on one spot, leaving a mark. He left it high up and toward the front enough that it would be next to impossible to hide.

"I'm not gonna be able to hide that, you know." I informed him. He smirked as he looked up at me. "That's the whole point, Jayme. I want everyone, including those nurses, to know that you're taken..." he trailed off when he realized what he had just implied. I felt a smile spread over my face at that thought. I raised an eyebrow up at him.

"So this is more than just a one time thing," I started to reply as I pressed my lips softly against his accentuating every line I said, "that we're more than just best friends now." another kiss, "We're like "An item" now?" kiss, "A couple?" kiss. He slipped his hands into mine and intertwined them.

"If you wanna be...?" he whispered not meeting my eyes and then pressing his lips to mine softly. I smiled and kissed him back tenderly, amazed at how he could think that there was any chance that I couldn't. I was also amazed at how fast everything was moving, less than ten minutes ago he had barged into my office like normal, and now we had ended up on the couch kissing and now hopefully in some sort of a relationship.

"I wanna be." I answered when we broke. He relaxed visibly and then smirked at me apparently content or at least less miserable. He continued his stipulations along my neck. I felt his fingers undoing the buttons down my shirt nimbly and as I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his tenderly as I pushed of his jacket and slid my hands underneath his shirt.

When he undid the last button he pushed the shirt off my shoulders, after having taken care of my tie, as he explored my mouth. We both broke and I sat up and pushed him down onto the couch. He struggled with me briefly for a few moments, apparently wanting to be dominant. That wasn't gonna happen and he finally excepted the fact that he wasn't gonna win after about five minutes and just sighed and let me do as I wished.

I smirked victoriously as he murmured something sounding like "cripple abuse" and chuckled as I pushed him back down and straddled his waist. I pulled at the hem of his shirt bringing it up to under his arms; he arched his back and then sat up lifting his arms up obligingly. I pulled it over his head and pressed my hands onto his chest.

I pushed him back again and kissed him softly along the jaw and down his neck. Taking the time to leave my own mark on his neck where he couldn't cover it up. I kissed down his chest and sucked on his nipples twisting them and biting down softly. He writhed slightly and made a funny sound like a whimper. I looked up at him and smirked, "apparently this has a similar affect on guys." I chuckled at his flushed appearance and leaned down licking his nipple and blowing across it. He gasped slightly.

I undid his belt and unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans. I pulled them and his boxers down springing his erection free. He kicked his jeans and boxers down and off all the way. I smiled dangerously as I brushed a finger along his cock's side. He gasped and grabbed both my wrists tightly with one hand and put the other on my chest and pushed me down onto the couch.

Before I could do anything to fight him he switched his position so he was straddling my waist. "You don't mess with me, Jayme. I always win." He told with a dangerous smile.

He pressed his lips to mine roughly and climbed off of me. I sat up so that my back hit the back of the couch while he dropped to his knees and his fingers nimbly undid my belt and pants. He pushed them along with my boxers down to my ankles, letting my erection free. Eventually I stopped struggling with him and just leaned my head back against the back of the couch. He pulled the rest of my clothes completely off and then, on a whim, licked the side of my cock from base to head. I gasped and through my head back as I clenched the material of the couch so tightly that it turned my knuckles white.

He took the whole thing in his mouth and slowly pumped in and out. I moaned loudly and knotted my fingers in his hair. I closed my eyes tight and gasped out, "Faster, please, faster. Harder, Greg. God, please." He picked up the pace and pumped me harder bringing me almost to the edge till I asked him to stop.

He stopped and looked up at me, confusion written all over his face. I blushed furiously. "Please. I need you in me. Please, Greg. I need you so bad, please." I pleaded with him. Understanding spread across his face and then he smirked and chuckled. He reached a hand up asking for help getting up and I gave it to him. When he was up he kneeled on the couch directly to the left of me and pressed his lips against my hungrily. I moaned softly as I slid my arms around his neck. Both of us were completely naked now.

He sat down next to me, but before he could do anything further I reached forward and grabbed his dick. I squeezed softly and he gasped out loud, throwing his head back against the couch and clutching at the fabric. I pumped him slowly and gently until he was begging me to go faster and harder. I cooperated until he was almost at his edge then he pulled away from me. That startled and surprised me thoroughly and I looked at him with confusion. He just simply gasped for air for a couple of minute and then breathed out, "lubricant?"

I blinked and chuckled now figuring out why he had stopped me. I got to my feet and went to my desk. I pulled out one of the drawers and grabbed a bottle of Vaseline. I unscrewed the top and left it on the desk. I headed back to the couch with the jar and, taking some of it out of the jar, coated his dick with it. He writhed under my touch and when I finished looked up at me and gasped, "If you are trying to torture me, you're succeeding." Between breaths.

I chuckled and pushed the jar into his hands. He smirked at me mischievously and pushed me back onto the length of the couch. He spread my legs open and put some on his fingers. I gasped and arched my back up with a moan when I felt his Vaseline coated fingers in me. I writhed on the couch as he deepened it and then waited patiently for me to catch my breath. After a couple of second I bucked my hips involuntarily with desire and got his fingers deeper accidentally. I gasp out and he chuckled apparently amused by my attempts.

To my great pleasure he slid in another finger and pumped me till I was at the edge. Then he slid his fingers out and coated his fingers with Vaseline once more and again spread it over his cock. Impatiently, I dipped my fingers in the bottle and pushed his hand away from his dick and pumped him for a good five minutes till he was at the edge again, writing and squirming under my steady hand, begging me to let him fuck me. I liked the fact that I had that power to reduce him to begging. Finally, I released him. He rested for a couple of seconds breathing in short uneven gasps. Then, turning to me with lustful eyes, he pushed me down against the edge of the couch and stood up.

He put his dick to the opening of my ass teasing me slightly till I begged him to cut it out and just fuck me. Finally, he did as I asked, and I cried out in pain and pleasure. He waited patiently for me to get use to his length as he slid in a little more every time I calmed, for the most part. When he was in all the way he slid in and out very slowly and gently while I gasped and writhed on the couch.

"Please….just fuck me… harder…faster…as hard…and as fast…as you can!" I finally begged.  
He obliged as he picked up the pace just a bit more and more, till finally he was slamming into me as fast and as hard as he could. I came shortly after that harder than I ever had before yelling his name and Greg came not even a second after me yelling mine. As we both came down he pumped me slowly and then slid out of me toppling down out top of me apparently spent. He slid off of me to the left and on his side, his back to the back of the couch. He carefully spooned up behind me, wrapping his arms around my torso tightly. He leaned his head on the back of my shoulders, the both of us breathing loudly and shallowly. I cover his hands with my own and leant my head back against his shoulder.

After a couple of minutes, when I could do more than just breathe, I spun in his grip so I was facing him. I pulled my arms up and around his neck as he tightened his grip on my waist. I leaned my forehead against his as he smiled softly at me.

"You were wrong, you know?" he told me with a very happy smirk.

"I was? About what?" I questioned as he turned so he was lying on his back. Carefully I slid down a bit and rested my head on his chest. He intertwined his fingers at my side as I wrapped my arms around his neck. I closed my eyes, resting but still listening.

"You said that you think you mean _nothing_ to me." He whispered softly. I looked up at him.

"When in reality, you mean _everything _to me. You're my whole world, Jayme. You **have** to know that." He told me, his ice-blue eyes begging.

I nodded as I laid my head back down on his chest and closed my eyes again.

"Greg?" I called softly.

"Yeah?" Greg answered.

"You were wrong too." You replied.

"I was? I'm never wrong. What about?" he questioned with interest.

"You said that 'All I have ever wanted was for someone to truly look up to me'." I responded as I looked up at him. He nodded.

"When in reality, all I have ever wanted was _you_. All I have ever truly wanted- all I have ever truly needed- was you. You have to know that." I told him my hazel brown eyes pleading. He smiled and nodded.

"Jayme, I believe that was THE CORNIEST THING YOU HAVE _EVER _SAID. Yet somehow, I don't mind." He told me laughing.

"So was what you said."

"Yeah, I suppose you're right."

I closed my eyes and sighed contently. Then something popped into my head that I had to ask him.

"Greg?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you… less miserable?"

"Nope."

My heart fell. "Oh…"

He chuckled amused. "I'm not less miserable, Jayme. I'm happy."

I blinked looking up at him with surprise. "Really?"

"Yeah, Jayme, really. Because I get you. Now go to sleep. I'm spent and I can tell you are too."

"Okay."

I closed my eyes and was about to slide into unconsciousness but something nagged me to say one last thing. I cant say what, but it worked.

"Greg."

"What?" he asked more tired then irritated.

More softly, "I'm glad I was wrong before, about me meaning nothing to you, I mean."

He chuckled and pulled me closer. "Jayme."

"Yeah?"

"_I'm glad __**I **__was wrong, before._"

I laughed softly as I tightened my grip on him. "I love you."

"Love you too. Now go to sleep." He replied laughing softly and tiredly.

"Okay" I replied yawning tiredly as I slipped into unconsciousness

For the first time in almost 15 years I slept peacefully. What Greg said before was right. What happens next, happens. We would burn that bridged when we came to it. And we'd do it together. I loved him and he loved me. We want- no, we need- each other. As long as we were together, as far as I'm concerned, anything is possible…

*This was like the fluffiest thing I've ever written. And I loved it. I'm gonna have sweet dreams tonight. This took a forever to write. I'm serious, between me and my siblings fighting over the computer, it took 4 days. I'm glad it's finally done. I hope you liked it. I'm thinking of doing like an epilogue set 3 years later. But like my sis, I want to know your opinion on it. So stop by my profile page and vote there or just vote on your review. Please review. Like I said this took forever.


	2. Some upsetting news Try and understand

_**Please read and try to understand why Arya8996, Fate-Means-Screwed-On-Purpose, and PromiseMeTomorrow haven't been updating:**_

* Hi! How are you guys? No, this isn't Arya, this is her twin sister Violet (or otherwise known as Fate-Means-Screwed-On-Purpose and Promise (otherwise known as PromiseMeTomorrow). The sole reason we're on Arya's account is that we have some very upsetting news. It's a very long story but we're gonna trim it down to size for you.

Arya has been very depressed lately and it has been getting worse. It recently has been discovered that she has been cutting herself. How do I know this? No, she didn't tell us or give us any reason to think she was even more depressed then Violet (Fate)'s been. Umm… this is a very touchy subject for the three of us: Arya, Promise, and myself… we'll just get to the point.

On Monday, March 1st, 2010 Aryannah Legacy, Violet's sister and Promise's best friend, attempted suicide. We found her in the very back room of our house. Somehow she had gotten a whole of Violet's painkillers (She's a victim of Chronic Pain) and downed the what Violet had left in the bottle. Seventeen pills. When we got to her she was barely breathing and had left us a note. Please understand why we won't tell you what she wrote, that is for our eyes only.

She was released from the hospital yesterday and is now in **Sagamore Children's Psychiatric Center.**

For this reason her stories will from here on be postponed. They're on Hiatus.

Hope's Promise is also on hold because we refuse to continue without Arya. I and Promise will still be on and will be updating shortly. Don't think of us as heartless for continuing our stories. The only reason we are doin so is for theses reasons.

1) Arya made us promise we would continue our stories.

2) It helps take our mind off reality. We want to lose ourselves in our own make believe worlds.

To make this clear the following stories from all three of us will be postponed, if yours is not listed then hopefully it will be updated shortly.

_**These stories are now on Hiatus:**_

Forever

Forever Heart

Always Have, Always Will

Game Of Desire

One Promise To Keep (This is Fate-Means-Screwed-On-Purpose's story but Arya was helping and she doesn't feel right writing it without her.)

Quiet Heartbeats

I Wish You Knew

Accidental Miracles (Again written by both Violet and Arya)

Hope's Promise (All three versions.

_**These Stories WILL STILL BE UPDATED REGULARLY**_:

Six Feet Deep In Fidelity

Make a Wish

Never is Forever

Chasing Freedom

Dana and/or Tori, sorry we haven't kept in touch. A lot has happened. We miss you and hope you are safe.

We are terribly sorry if this is an inconvenience to anyone and I hope you understand. Good luck to all of you and may the stars watch over you and good fortune rule over you and all whom you may love.

-Violet (Fate-Means-Screwed-On-Purpose) and Promise (PromiseMeTomorrow)


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